Advice for Teens - Don't Cry.
|Advice for Teens = Don't Cry.|
Girls are sucky too. Teenagers suck. I didn't like most of them when I was a teenager - something crazy happens to their brains. I've never understood it. Perfectly intelligent, respectable kids turn into illogical beings from outer space.
I hate that most teenagers act without thinking. Somehow, they convince themselves that point B does not result from Point A. Now, medical science has proven it is a consequence of an undeveloped brain. The brain does not fully develop the ability to think things through until our twenties. The Teen Brain
Don't tell them that! It makes a great excuse, blame it on science.
What about our conscience? Or our mechanisms for fear? The fear of God, the fear of strict parents, or the fear of ruining our reputations as decent, honorable human beings? The fear of not making it into our twenties?
I was raised on a heightened sense of fear. Sure, I made some mistakes. Mostly, I set lofty goals for myself and strived to keep them. I am basically proud of my teen years. Even the best of us succumb to peer pressure.
I also had an incredible friend that I admired and respected. Even when she wasn't around, I worried what she would think if she found out I did something dumb. I didn't want to disappoint anyone- especially myself.
If your conscience doesn't work so well, you need a friend like this, preferably, one that you can't tell a lie.
Hey teenagers! It is difficult to live with disappointing yourself. Once you start letting yourself down, it gets easier each time, "Well, I've already broken this rule so I might as well break that one - it's not nearly as shameful." Besides, you're having fun so it can't be all bad, right?
Okay, maybe a little rule breaking builds character, maybe it gives you a strong foundation for becoming a smart adult. You are walking a very thin line. Once that side of you takes over it is hard to stop. Self-esteem shoots out the window before it even had a chance to take hold.
Sucky girls make me cry too, but this is not about girls.
Boys! They are not smarter than you. They are not cooler than you. They probably aren't more experienced than you. Somehow, they've learned to spin an excellent yarn or act an amazing show.
It wasn't until my brothers became teenagers that I fully understood this phenomenon. They were babies. They didn't know anything. They hurt but kept it hidden from the world. They weren't cool but put on an awesome show. Girls really liked them.
Sadly, that guy you admire is afraid of you. He is afraid of his friends too. They are all joking about sex. Geesh, he doesn't even know what the other guys are referring too. Maybe, they've got cable or free access to the Internet. Maybe their parents are too open. He feels stupid, maybe, you know more than he does. Sucky boy has to play it cool. He doesn't want to be left out of the game.
So, you buy into the cool persona and you fall head over heels. You've never met anyone so mature (cough, cough). His breath on your neck makes you swoon... that's unfortunate.
He's so experienced vs.Your such a lame.
Maybe he could teach you something. He whispers sweet nothings... Does he? Or does he say things to smash your self-esteem? "What have you got to lose?" "I heard you..." So what if he did? So what if you did? You don't have to make the same mistake twice!!
That boy set a lofty goal, one he thought was unobtainable and there you are to fulfill his wishes. After all, 'He's the one', Prince Charming is going to take you away from your miserable life. You like having a beau and you feel threatened - if you don't do it you're sure to lose him.
Red Flag Alert! Red Flag Alert! Run the other way as fast as you can.
Sure, it happens for some people. They marry their high-school sweetheart and live... ever after.
Boys are kids, just like you, with Mommys and Daddys who discipline them. How embarrassing. How shameful, You can't let anyone know your parents treat you like a little kid! You have to play it cool.
Cool people know this sucks. It sucks to feel like you are the only one doing the right thing. It's embarrassing. The teasing is grueling. It takes a brave kid to stand up in a room full of uncool kids and say, "This makes me uncomfortable, I'm leaving."
Sure, some of them will laugh at you. They'll mock you. They'll dare you. But, what if, one kid asks for a ride home. What if no one is as brave as you this time, but your actions really hit home and someone vows never to do this again? You could be a hero, a truly, cool person.
Don't cave in on your morals. Don't ignore your conscience. More importantly, 'Don't give up on yourself.'
When you grow up, (if) you'll likely discover that most kids weren't doing everything you thought they were, and the kids that were probably fantasized about being cool just like you. They wanted parents that really cared or the courage to stand up for their core values.
Sucky boys make me cry because they are somebody's baby brother or precious little boy just trying to fit in and gain acceptance. When sucky girls play into their fears it builds a whole new world of suckiness.
p.s. I know of a boy that doesn't suck, your Mom probably does too. Hang in there, before you know it, you'll be the Mom of a teenager too. May God bless you and mother's everywhere.